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* * *
(*)  <---- direct link to audio archive page
         title <---- link to amplificathon page containing summaries, pairings, ratings, warnings, etc
           (a)  <---- my notation for organizational purposes - ignore it (means the direct DL link has been updated on amplificathon)http://www.livejournal.com/editjournal.bml?journal=kalakirya&itemid=11051
           (D) <---- link to amplificathon @ dreamwidth page (also contains summaries, pairings, ratings, warnings, etc)
           (AO3) <- self explanatory, no?
           (.) <----- link to post on my journal (ie. if all else fails this will have it)

(*) And Will Stand Witness by moorishflower (x-over with Doctor Who)   (a) (D) (.)
(*) So This is Brunch by entangled_now (D) (a) (.)
(*) Three Month Milestone by moorishflower (D) (a) (.)
(*) Give Me a Reason by morganoconner  (a) (D) (.)
(*) Trinkets and Trifles by ameonna1(a) (D) (.)
(*) One of Us by entangled_now(a) (D) (.)
(*) Demonstrations by entangled_now(a) (D) (.)
(*) Rorschach by entangled_now(a) (D) (.)
(*) Old Acquaintances by entangled_now   (a) (D) (.)
(*) After the Storm by morganoconner(a) (D) (.)
(*) Can You Hear Heaven Cry by morganoconner   (a) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) Important Angel Business by entangled_now (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) How to Lose a Drinking Game in Five Turns by ameonna1   (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) In Dreams I See You by morganoconner (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) People and Angels of Walmart by ameonna1 (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Teamwork bymorganoconner (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Peppermint Lullaby by morganoconner (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*)       above six in compiled podbook by cybel
(*) Follow Me Down by entangled_now (a) (D) (AO3)
(*) Deadspace by entangled_now (a) (D) (AO3)
(*)       Follow Me Down and Deadspace as a podbook by cybel (a) (D)
(*) All Come Back Around by entangled_now (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*)       All Come Back Around as podbook by cybel
(*) Your Bottle Is Empty (But Your Glass Has Been Filled) by jjtaylor (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)           podbook by cybel
(*) The Mostly Accidental Courtship of Dean Winchester by tuesdayfic (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)         podbook by cybel
Tarnished Silver by jesseebee
    podbook of Tarnished Silver by cybel
(*) Start Quoting Shakespeare and We're Done by pyrebi (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)         podbook by cybel
(*) Omni Gladio Ancipiti by lifevolutionary (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)       podbook by cybel

Man From UNCLE
(*) Better Late Than Never by crimsonquills (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) Sand Trap by xparrot (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)         podbook by cybel
(*) For Every Action by xparrot (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)        podbook by cybel
(*) Discretionary Powers by xparrot (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) Sublimeriung by xparrot (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) The 100 Words Affair by xparrot (a) (D) (AO3)
(*) The Two Men in a Bed Affair by laceymcbain (a) (D) (AO3)

Stargate: Atlantis
(*) All three "Farm in Iowa"-'verse Christmas stories (a) (D) (.)
    Letters to Santa by sheafrotherdon
    The Baby Jesus' Pompoms by sheafrotherdon
    The Christmas Shenanigans of Finn McKay by sheafrotherdon
(*) Fake Birds and Real Holidays by xparrot (D) (.)
(*) 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea by merryish (D) (.) (a)
(*) Far, Far Away by astolat (x-over with American Idol) (D) (.) (a)
(*) Broadcast Signal by seperis (D) (.) (a)
(*) A New History of Captain John Shepard [...] by sheafrotherdon (x-over with Temeraire) * (D) (.)
(*)       podbook of A New History by cybel
(*) Highly Classified and Very Hush-Hush by rageprufrock (D) (.)
(*) Strictly on a Need-to-Know Basis by rageprufrock (D) (.)
(*) The Alien Fighters' Social Club by such_heights (x-over with Torchwood) (D) (.)
(*) Learning to Breathe by speranza (.) (D) (AO3)

(*) A Place to Stand by lightgetsin (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Improbable Scenes from an Impractical Courtship by merryish (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) A Diversion by grey_bard (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) A Maze of Twisty Passages, All Alike by merryish (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)       podbook by cybel
(*) Complicated by schemingreader (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) Exceeding Orders by philomytha (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Women's Work by philomytha (.) (D) (AO3)

Young Wizards
(*) Three Encounters in a Cafe by readingredhead(D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Valentine by readingredhead (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Untitled fic by sillyangelfaery (D) (.) (a)
(*) Terminus by aria (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*)     podbook of Terminus by cybel
(*) On Life's Terms by rare_fandom (D) (.)
(*) Full Circle by araine (D) (.)
(*) The One Where They're All in a Rock Band by labellementeuse(D) (.)
(*) Making Peace by asphaltangel(D) (.) (a)
(*) The Next Journey by araine (.) (D) (AO3)

Due South
(*) Fangirl!Frannie by innocentsmith (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Learn to Speak Canine in Seven Easy Steps by etceteracat (D) (.)
(*) Six Degrees of Separation by etceteracat (D) (.)
(*)       compiled podbook of Learn to Speak and Six Degrees by cybel (AO3)
(*) Where the Story Changes by seperis (D) (.) (a)
(*)       podbook created by cybel (D)
(*) Hungry Like the... Thing by liviapenn (x-over with Psych) (a) (D) (.)
(*) A Fine upstanding Man by akamine_chan (a) (D) (.)
(*) Open the World by luzula (a) (D) (.)
(*) (*) The Language of Love (translation) by china_shop (AO3) (a) (D) (.)
(*) (*) The Language of Love (French only) by china_shop (AO3) (a) (D) (.)

(*) Tomorrow Belongs to Me by valtyr (a) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)            podbook by cybel (D) (.)
               podbook by penumbren (D)
(*) Chaos War by astolat (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)            podbook by cybel
(*) Run Program: DUM-E by amuly (.) (D) (AO3) (a)
(*)           podbook by cybel
(*) David Attenborough is in my Bedroom by cactus_rabbit (D) (.) (a)
(*) Everything's Better with Bunnies by khilari and persephone_kore (a) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) D17D0 by helens78 (a collaboration w/ a friend who shall not be named) (a) (D) (.)
(*) Bedtime Stories (ALL 21 OF THEM - THIS IS THE LINK YOU WANT) by gyzym (AO3)
              first set (17)
               second set (4)

(*) Constantly Offered New Toys by sinuous_curve (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) A Meeting of Minds by crimsonquills (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*)       podbook created by cybel
(*) Five Times Lilo and Stitch Meet the Avengers, and One Time They Meet Loki by phoenixfawkes12 (x-over with Lilo and Stitch) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) With A Little Help From My Friends by lucdarling (a) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) The Best in Life is But Intoxication by kellifer_fic (a) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) 64 Colors by musesfool (a) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) Protect You by ashinan (a) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) Metal Heart by ashinan (a) (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) You're a Rich Little Boy (who's had to work for his toys) by snowdarkred (D) (.) (a)
(*) Crossover Event by haunted on dreamwidth (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Overheard on the Party Line by bessemerprocess on dreamwidth (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Much Sooner Forgotten by sinuous_curve (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) This Wasn't What the Brochure Promised by kahn (D) (.) (a)
(*) Nesting Habits of the Wild North American Barton by sabinelagrande (D) (.) (a)
(*) Stockholm Syndrome and Other Drugs by alchemyalice (D) (.) (a)
(*) Few So Generous by galaxysoup (.) (D) (AO3)
(*) For Children by cathalin (.) (D) (AO3)
(*) Five People Who Caught Darcy Doodling by seawench (.) (D) (AO3)
(*) Bros! by alchemyalice (.) (D) (AO3)
(*) Anyone Ever Tell You How Your Eyes Sparkle When You're Angry? by sidneysussex (.) (D) (AO3)
(*) Where You End by ashinan (.) (D) (AO3)
   Four not!fics by gyzym x-over with Teen Wolf (.) (D) (AO3)
   (*)    Teen Wolf/Avengers Feels
   (*)    Derek and Steve at the Bar
   (*)    Derek and Steve and Relationship Advice
   (*)    Stiles and Tony and Relationship Advice
(*) Gift of Asylum by carleton97 and sister_wolf (.) (D) (AO3)
(*) Louder Than Bells by carleton97 and sister_wolf (.) (D) (AO3)

White Collar
(*) Let's Play Ball by hoosierbitch (a) (D) (AO3)
(*) Twist to Fit by zvi (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Her Boss's Keeper by sholio (.) (D) (AO3)

(*) Hearts Like Flowers by springgreen (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) Promises Unbroken by springgreen (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) End of Burial by andmydog (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) The End by andmydog (D) (.) (AO3)

Teen Wolf
(*) Be Here in the Morning Just to Hear You Say by januarylight (D) (.) (AO3)
(*)       podbook by cybel
(*) Hail to Whatever You Found in the Sunlight (series) by skoosiepants (D) (.) (AO3)
(*) Fuzzy Logic by sparseparsley (.) (D) (AO3) (a)
(*) Sluice by goddessofbirth (.) (D) (AO3) (a)
(*) A Simple Game of Fetch by brilligspoons (.) (D) (AO3) (a)

Good Omens
(*) Just Save the First Edition for Me by such_heights (D) (.) (a)

Final Fantasy VII
(*) typecasting by jukeboxhound (D) (.) (a) (AO3)
(*) Imagine Them All in Their Underwear by
jukeboxhound (D) (.) (a) (AO3)

Lord of the Rings
(*) To Sail Against the Tide by grey_bard (a) (D)

Doctor Who
(*) The History of the Kings of Britain by livii (.) (D) (AO3)
(*) Your History Written in Time and Stars by such_heights (.) (D) (AO3)

(*) Many Kinds off Man, Many Kinds of Bodywash (director's cut) by helens78 (a) (D) (.) (AO3)

(*) Many Kinds off Man, Many Kinds of Bodywash (edited version) by helens78 (a) (D) (.) (AO3)

Supernatural Gabriel-is-a-kitten ficlet on comment_fic
massively depressing Young Wizards death!fic on myriadwords (what was I thinking?)

Rather Be on whitecollarfic
massive Gabriel-centric crossover of DOOM for comment_fic
        which I podficced here (D) (.)
* * *
Title: truth to tell
Author: [Unknown LJ tag]
Reader: [personal profile] kalakirya
Fandom: Critical Role
Pairings: Kima/Allura
Rating: gen
Summary: Truth to tell, Kima hasn’t thought of Allura in days.
content notes: set during episode 14
Length: 3:37
text at AO3

download from the audioarchive as an mp3 (3.5MB) or direct link (left-click to download, right-click to stream)

cover by me!

Title: private things private
Pairings: Kima/Allura
Rating: gen
Summary: Allura likes to keep her private things private.
content notes: none
Length: 2:40
text at AO3

download from the audioarchive as an mp3 (2.7MB) or direct link (left-click to download, right-click to stream)

cover by me!

Title: thankful
Pairings: none
Rating: gen
Summary: In the underdark, Kima is thankful to Vox Machina. She doesn’t want to be.
content notes: set around episode 7-ish
Length: 3:37
text at AO3

download from the audioarchive as an mp3 (5.1MB) or direct link (left-click to download, right-click to stream)

cover by me!

* * *
Title: And Never Been Kissed
Authors: [Unknown LJ tag] and [Unknown LJ tag]
Reader: [personal profile] kalakirya
Fandom: Hockey RPF
Pairings: Sid/Geno
Rating: explicit
Summary: Sid didn’t introduce himself in the hallway, and he certainly doesn’t assume that people know who he is. So it would only be polite to thank Malkin again, this time more personally.
He could write him a letter. An email? No, a letter.

Warnings: none
text at AO3

OK, so there are a number of ways to listen to this story. Click through for details, downloading and streaming

If you'd like to download final version the way I prefer it (with music and lots of chapter covers), that's here as an mp3 (982MB) or here as an audiobook (480MB) (both 17:55:30)

if you've been downloading as I post OR would prefer a music-free version, downloads and streams are here

if you'd like to listen to the chapters individually, scroll down

Chapter One
Warnings: none
Length: 2:13:37
download/stream as an mp3 (123MB)

Chapter Two
Warnings: none
Length: 3:24:17

download/stream as an mp3 (187MB)

Chapter Three
Warnings: none
Length: 3:31:11

download/stream as an mp3 (196MB)

Chapter Four
Warnings: none
Length: 3:31:46

download/stream as an mp3 (194MB)

Chapter Five
Warnings: none 
Length: 3:31:46

download/stream as an mp3 (96MB)

Chapter Six
Warnings: none 
Length: 3:31:46

download/stream as an mp3 (189MB)

(note: themusecalliope pointed out that I mispronounced "Wilkes-Barre", which can be pronounced a number of ways, but not the way I actually said it XD it turned out to be too difficult to do a pick-up for that bit, though, and given that it was still clear what I meant to say, I left it in. But let it be known that that's my mistake, not themusecalliope's, who is wonderful in all ways <3<3<3)

pennyplainknits is also podficcing this story! her version is here
* * *

notes and links 

  • m4b - an audiobook format; apple products know to treat them as audiobooks and not songs. can be chaptered.
  • chapter and verse - an audiobook making program (iTunes will do m4bs for you, so this is mostly a Windows ppl thing)
  • Audacity - audio editing software for windows
  • Garageband - audio editing software for mac
  • Hindenberg - professional audio editing software
  • podfic_love - podfic rec comm
  • podfic-tips - podfic tutorial and tips comm
  • blanket permission - prevents you from having to request permission. fanlore has a list here. fire_juggler maintains fandom-specific lists here.
  • audiofic.jinjurly.com - the audiofic archive
  • amplificathon - a DW and LJ comm where podfic gets posted. if you post here, unless you opt out, it will be archived in the audioarchive automatically. Also an annual challenge designed to increase podficcing in small fandoms; FAQ for that here 
  • pod_together - a challenge that matches writers and podficcers for a new collaborative work
  • podfic_bingo - a way of stretching your podfic muscles (signups close at the end of august!)
  • podfic big bang - multi-fandom 10K challenge
  • epic podfic big bang - for those who don't get out of bed for less than 75K (hosted on the same com as PBB)
  • #ITPE - the holiday podfic exchange, stands for International Twitter Podfic Exchange (you do need twitter for this)
  • multipod - a podfic with multiple voices
  • re-pod - a podfic of a story that has already been podficced
  • accents - a thing that you should not allow to prevent you from podficcing
  • 10K = 1 hour - a rough approximation of how many words translates to how much podfic
  • podficmeta - the podfic-discussion comm zvi mentioned
  • auralphonic - the podcast about podfic
  • collaborativepodfic - a DW comm for finding ppl to do multivoiced podfic with


things I meant to mention but didn't:

  • the "podfic welcome" and "blanket permission" tags on AO3 are good ways to draw podficcers' attention and/or find stuff to podfic
  • we love non-english podfic too! you get extra points on amplifcathon and much love from the multi-lingual!
  • you don't have to do covers, but some people like to! I use GIMP, a free photoshop clone. Windows users may need a special program to add covers to mp3s; I use mediamonkey 
  • awesome ladies podfic anthology - anthologies of podfic about ladies of <1K. an excellent way to get your feet wet.
  • WAGFAPE - the Women And Genderqueers First Podfic Exchange, where you sign up to make podfic that don't focus on cismen
  • forvo sometimes has useful pronunciation guides. sometimes. use your judgement.
  • ditto dictionary.com
  • the word "gasps" is an evil unto this world that should be forever shunned
things other people mentioned
  • [personal profile] ambyr is wonderful and has added say how, a pronunciation guide for famous and semi-famous names, and the ABC book, for corporate brand name

I can be reached here, on LJ under this name, on twitter under this name, or on tumblr under podficcerbynight
* * *
Title: each according to their nature
Author: [Unknown LJ tag]
Reader: [personal profile] kalakirya
Fandom: Rivers of London
Pairings: none
Rating: gen
Summary: “What kind?” Nightingale asked, like that was any sort of reasonable question when wings.
content notes: none
Length: 00:31:39
text at AO3

download from the audioarchive as an mp3 (29.1MB) or as a podbook (22.5MB)

direct link (left-click to download, right-click to stream)

cover by me, from a photo by bernard dupont

* * *
* * *
Title: Velvet
Author: [Unknown LJ tag]
Reader: [personal profile] kalakirya
Fandom: Sailor moon
Pairings: Michiru/Haruka
Rating: mature
Summary: Learning to be both Michiru and Sailor Neptune is a process. Backstory.
content notes: Haruka gets misgendered
Length: 1:25:20
text at AO3

download from the audioarchive as an mp3 (78.2MB) or as a podbook (60.7MB)

direct link (left-click to download, right-click to stream)

cover by me!

* * *
Title: Come Away to the Water
Author: [personal profile] leobrat | [Unknown LJ tag]
Reader: [personal profile] kalakirya
Fandom: Spartacus
Pairings: Crixus/Naevia, Agron/Nasir, Melitta/Oenomaus, Barca/Pietros
Rating: Mature
Summary: Come away, little lass, come away to the water. Away from the light you always knew. We are calling to you... Naevia was born, and then lived her whole life.
Content Notes: graphic depictions of violence, major character death, rape/non-con
Length: 03:26:11
text at AO3
music Come Away to the Water cover by Dasha & Nicole

direct downloads: mp3 (188MB) | m4b (114MB)

streaming and chapter direct downloads

chapter one (00:45:55, 42.1MB)

chapter two (00:52:50, 48.4MB)

chapter three (00:54:01, 49.5MB)

chapter four (00:42:40, 39.1MB)

podficcer's notes (00:10:44, 9.88MB)

cover by me!

* * *
Today I was thinking about how and why I get attached to certain characters so intensely. For the most part I fall into fandoms easily, and fall out of them nearly as easily. I don’t leave fandoms much – Sherlock and Teen Wolf are the exceptions to the rule – but there was a hot minute where I read a lot of Dresden Files, and another for Dorian/the Iron Bull, and original Man from UNCLE, and Man from UNCLE (2015), and Athelstan/Lagertha/Ragnar, and Bilbo/Thorin, and NCIS, and Eagle of the Ninth, and Sentinel, and Labyrinth, and Inception, and Star Wars of all flavors. I occasionally still dip into those fandoms, and don’t consider myself to have left them, but I certainly don’t go back to them day after day after day for years. Hockey rpf – Sid/Geno, if I’m honest – I have gone back to daily for nearly two years. And that’s kinda weird. I haven’t even done that for Gabriel from Supernatural, who is otherwise my longest-lived fannish touchstone. I was thinking about it, and realized that though Sid/Geno as a pairing sticks with me for a few reasons, it was mostly that I got really, really attached to Sidney Crosby, both as a fannish rpf character, and as a character in hockey media. And that’s kinda weird for me, to be honest.
I care about Sid for a very specific reason, because he, as a character, came into my life at a very specific time. Just when I was getting into hockey rpf and was looking around for a new shiny, a number of things came together and I realized that I may be on the spectrum. Family stories, of infant!me screaming if I was picked up by anyone other than my parents, of delayed developmental stages, of child!me adapting very poorly to change, memories of being told off for toe-walking, of endless conversations where I knew I was missing some conclusion that came easily to people around me, of practicing maintaining eye contact, of sensory issues ad naeuseum, added up to a conclusion that I still haven't had checked out by a medical doctor*. In some ways, I don't want to know. At this point I’ve practiced and worked out coping mechanisms and work-arounds. It’s who I am. But the fact that society doesn’t like that very much continues to be hard to deal with. I stick out, in a lot of ways, and some days that’s really hard. I’ve spent a lot of time and energy trying to not stick out, not be so weird, not be so awkward, not be so strange. 


But I look at Sidney Crosby, notoriously superstitious and awkward, and I see someone with problems like mine. Someone who gets very nervous in large empty rooms – Sid's stall is often on the end, next to a wall (if there is one - the Pens' circular locker room makes me profoundly uneasy). Someone who isn’t very comfortable touching new people – in photos with fans, he usually has his hands in his pockets. Someone who doesn’t like new clothes – Sid’s famous for wearing the same gear until it literally falls off of him; I hate clothes shopping for many reasons, but one is that new clothing is upsetting to wear because it aggravates my sensory issues. His media appearances are characterized as being amazingly practiced and bland, and I hear that and think about how I practice and plan responses in conversations because I can’t trust that my tongue won’t trip me up. I hate public speaking but have done enough of it that I can do it well when necessary. When I knew my thesis defense was coming up, I practiced my talk two or three times a day for two weeks. For the first week I was so upset that those two or three hours of talking would leave me shaking and teary for hours and completely blow out my voice for the entire day, but after two weeks I had it down. I was told that I passed with flying colors. I like spending time with kids for several reasons, but they don’t mind when I talk an extra minute to parse something, or get enthusiastic about something, or miss a social cue. Before a recent interview he did with rookie goalie Matt Murray, Sid switched their name placards so that he was sitting on the left. A lot of people put this down to superstition, and maybe that’s all of it. But I have places I prefer to sit, and I get nervous and twitchy if I get moved around. I’m getting better at dealing with it, as I get older and have better coping mechanisms. But if I were about to go into a media conference? If I’m excited and keyed up and that energy could be good and push me to great things but could also push me off the precarious edge of good humor and into upset and depression? If I’m sitting next to a rookie who won’t know how to support me the way a veteran might but also won’t give me shit if I switch our seats? If I’m known for being a bit weird and this won’t really add to it? You’re damn right I’d switch seats and give myself a bit more of an even footing. My routines are important and change is very hard and very upsetting.


There could be any number of reasons for why Sid is the way he is and does the things he does, and they may be nothing like mine. A lot of people have quirks and ways that they like and don’t like doing things. That’s not my point though. A lot of people don’t like Sid because he’s “girly” or “a whiner” or “weird” or too good at what he does. I see someone who gets shit because of other people’s misogyny. Who sticks up for his teammates and doesn’t cooperate as much with the machismo and tough-guy-attitude of organized sports. Who has ticks and issues like mine and prioritizes his comfort and happiness over other people’s reactions. Who is one of the best players of his generation anyway.


I still feel weird about rpf. I’m uncomfortable with the way the media intrudes on players’ private lives, with the way fandom fetishes certain things and ignores others. I want these people to have lives out of the spotlight. And fandom does have non-rpf characters who are weird in similar ways: Benton Fraser and Rodney McKay come to mind right off the bat, but fandom is filled with them; we do like our misfits. But ultimately, they are fictional, all their ticks and preferences and hang-ups are the product of someone's imagination, and while that's better than nothing, it does put the ticks and preferences and hang-ups on a similar level to, say, wings, or lycanthropy. So the parallel to my experiences falls apart, a bit. Not entirely, but a bit.

I still feel weird about rpf, but there is a person - Sidney Crosby - who actually does do those things. Things like I do things. He has a media persona that fandom has crafted into an rpf character, but he does actually do those things. So while my engagement with hockey is nearly entirely fannish, my interest in Sid isn't, really. Rather, I’m appreciative of the public persona Sid has adopted, which is awkward, and a bit bland, and full of weird personal quirks like switching seats with another player before a press conference for no apparent reason. But I’m thankful for the things Sid does, publicly and without apology, because his example has helped me be more comfortable with myself and better advocate for myself. Sid’s had to deal with a lot of shit in his life. But he’s doing very well at the thing that he wants to be doing with his life. And he gives himself space for the things that make his life easier, even if society gives him shit for it.


I don’t know what I want to do with my life, and I’m not doing all that well at what I am doing. But I’m trying to be better at giving myself space for the things that will make my life easier, even if society gives me shit for it. If Sid can do it, I can do it. 

(Which is mostly a relatively long-winded way of saying that I'm not used to having real-life role models, and certainly not about this. But I'd already typed it all up before the phrase "role model" occurred to me, and I didn't want to waste it.)


*I'm aware that there's a lot more too it than that. There's a lot more from my end too, I'm just not comfortable giving out details of my medical and person history on the internet. Nor I am interested in talking about it. Please take it as given and move on.
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This post came out of a number of things, most notably the discussion around race in fandom this year. There's been a lot of meta on it, some of which I agree with, and some of which makes flames appear on the sides of my face. I don't want to get into the discussion: I like keeping my fannish activities non-rage-inducing. 

That said, a lot of what people were saying resonated. The ships and characters that fandom fixates on do tend to be very white. They also tend to be very male, and very m/m slash oriented. Which is not a thing I'm happy with.

In January I did an analysis of the shipping breakdowns of the podfic I'd produced the previous year, and the results were very disappointing: while I'd thought that I was doing a decent job of podficcing women and non-m/m stories, that wasn't borne out in the stats. I resolved to podfic more non-cis-male-centric stories, and so far I think I'm doing a decent job (that said, I haven't run the numbers yet, and I'd thought I was doing alright before!).

In January I didn't do a racial breakdown, though. Partly for time, partly because it's more complicated (more categories!), and partly because I had a pretty good idea I wouldn't be happy with the results. But that's a really, really terrible reason. So I did it anyway.

In order to get my numbers, I looked at the same set of podfics that I used for 2015's shipping and gender breakdown: all the completed podfics I posted in that year that I made solo. ("Completed" means that I left out "and never been kissed", which is a 160K white/white m/m slash story that I'm nearly done with which is going to kill my stats for this year.) I only counted the main characters (here defined as "when I think of the podfic who do I remember it being about") and used the canonical (or, lacking that, fannish) racial background of the characters (I had always thought that Nita and Dairine Callahan were Hispanic but apparently that is not canonically correct, so here they're counted as white). That produced this bar chart:

aaaaaaaand the main take away is damn that's very white. That is not what I wanted to be doing. That is just over 95% of my output. 

Another note on this chart: I've used American classifications of race and racial backgrounds. I'm American, and this is about my podfic, and my relationship to my podfic. If I were doing this a bit more scientifically, I would do it differently. But I'm not, and can only speak to my own perspective of my work. Also, I've been lead to understand that "latin@" is [one of the] preferred terminologies/spellings for the background of the characters in question - Mia Toretto and Letty Ortiz from the Fast and the Furious series - but I'm continuing to refine my understanding of who prefers what terms. 

For the purposes of curiosity, I broke it down by gender identity again. 

Soooooo when I do make podfic about non-white characters, it's almost invariably women. Which, while I'm not upset to have podficced more women than men, I don't like that all those columns are empty.

I'm not getting involved in the fannish discussions on race and society and social justice. I have my own, very strong, feelings on that, but I don't want to talk about them. I do want to spend more of my time creating fanworks that prioritize non-cis-male characters of color. 

I do want to add the tiny, tiny caveat that podfic, as a medium, is more limited than fanfic or fanart or many other fannish works. While we can create original fannish works, and I have, for the most part, we transform fanfiction, and therefore we are limited to the fanfiction that others choose to make. (Not!pods - "original fannish work" - weren't included in either of these breakdowns. I'm sorry to say that they mostly would have made my numbers worse anyway.) That's an explanation, but it is most certainly not an excuse. This year I've been more dedicatedly looking for stories to podfic that center non-white-cis-male characters, and while I've been a bit depressed by the results, I've also found some wonderful, lovely stories in fandoms I don't spend a lot of time in, about characters that I love but hadn't focused on as much. I'm not "eating my vegetables," I'm finding that an all-meat-and-potato diet was boring and not nutritious, while beets and brussel sprouts and beans and yams are fun and interesting and absolutely delicious. 
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Title: Fresh Poison Each Week
Author: [Unknown LJ tag]
Reader: [personal profile] kalakirya
Fandom: Merlin
Pairings: Nimueh/Ygraine
Rating: Teen and up
Summary: The Old Religion does not accept Ygraine Pendragon's death.
Content Notes: this is a Groundhog Day AU of a very bad day. It comes with repeated character death through childbirth, suicide, and murder, as well as brief mentions of the murder of children
Length: 9 minutes 56 seconds
text at AO3

download as a podbook (7.08MB) OR direct link (left-click to download, right-click to stream)

cover by me!

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